In addition to that, sometimes this concept has been used to describe how the partners of sex addicts feel and why it is difficult for them to leave a relationship.
However, I would like to branch out and explore the possible connection between trauma bonding and extramarital affairs.
While I did not read their paper, it got me to thinking.
Suddenly a light-bulb went on and I realized that this is why the plots of the most successful romantic comedies always include scenarios of frustration as key plot points.
The graphic above generally applies to physical abuse, but it can also apply to emotional abuse.
At the center of it all, the motive is power and control.
I also realized that this is why some men seem to love the girl that plays hard-to-get or who is the proverbial; one that got away. This led to thoughts of the role frustration plays in situations where there is infidelity.
Add to that, if true frustration is an essential element in falling in love, then it gets interesting.
Now, that very same cycle plays out during an extramarital affair.
But, while the motive may not be power and control, the same harmful dynamic exists and this harmful dynamic is cyclical.
The other day when I was looking for studies in psychology databases, I saw an abstract that caught my eye.
The abstract basically said that the author’s of a paper had found that extreme frustration in romantic relationships is an essential part of falling in love.